Tuesday, December 10, 2013

thoughts on marriage.

i'm listening to the goo goo dolls right now, around 9:19pm on this fantastic tuesday night on december 10, 2013.
    i had this post in my blogger drafts from an early november day when i needed to rant in a direct way addressing things a few people had told me in the pushy, know-it-all, affirmative style that some have when a 22 year old newlywed like me says we're waiting to have bebes. oh yeah. like you, being just several years older than me, are showing any more happiness or readiness for that season than someone my age.
    anyhow. this is not meant to be a rant anymore, but rather a compilation of my personal, unique loves and paragraphs of gratefulness for the goodness to waiting a little while before stepping into that huge life season. i'm so thankful for all that God is showing us in the quiet and settling and remaking our mindset about life and people and grace.
    onto the main writing, though. i edited it, so be thankful. (lol.)

i really like being married to my best friend. we've been married just a little over 6 months. i'm thankful it's just him and me, having a go at life, figuring things out together, making time for family and hobbies and downtime on his weekends.
    back in the first few months of marriage (when baby fever was the strongest), i took a good look at life and myself and decided i wanted to start and learn something that would be worth it in the end; something i didn't ever really think i could do before --it was an impossible thing, too challenging.
something constructive, good for my health, something i never dreamed i'd take up.
    thus started my journey of running. cousin andrea encouraged me, and now so does kelsey, a fantastic lady i met through blogging.

now, halfway through the first year of being married to my wonderful guy, i'm so glad we didn't choose to start a family quite yet.

i am learning that marriage is something to be cherished, and grown into every day. i have so much free time and energy to place on us and who we are right now. the kinks or frustration that crops up sometimes with different decisions to be made, whether financial or family wise. i know a baby will add to the frustrations and the joys, but right now i'm thankful for this just us time. (i love kids, i love babies. don't get me wrong at all!) we won't be just us again till we're old and getting touched with gray and then, bam, we'll probably have grandkids coming along after that..

i am learning that in marriage, while there is room in this present moment of our particular lives, i have the privilege of stretching into a skills that i never thought i'd acquire.
gaming. i'm slowly turning into a nerd. i love leveling up. i love health and power potions that i find and craft as an elf in The Lord of the Rings: War in the North video game.
    my efforts truly sucked in the first few weeks of trying to game, but he watched as i learned and grew and i gradually adjusted and became less stressed as moving my thumbs on the ps3 controller became easier for my brain to understand.
i'm also super thankful for justin's strong tendency towards story and character-led games, not focusing on numbers and stats and crazy suspense and zombies and guns only. i like his brain and philosophy regarding the whole video game thing. i like it a lot. (any of you who ever meet him and/or get to ask him about video games and all that jazz, you'll know what i mean.)

thus ends my thoughts on this so far.
maybe i'll write another post at the year mark.

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